Sta.sh
The tale began with my trudge down the road.
Hidden faces piercing me; were I some sort of a show?
But I was broken, broken within my heart.
And so I realized too late,
but even before I could have realized, my glasses broke.
If I were to wear them,
would appear the people,
who imitated my friends.
But sculptures too erode; they're nothing anymore,
through my broken glasses.
I once sensed the feel,
were I lost in lost spaces;
for them I wasn't even real.
Nothing more I'll be, they still jeer at me,
while I wear broken glasses.
She did love me once,
such long time ago,
when times were not tense.
But breaking a pledge? That I shall never forget
while I wear broken glasses.
But still rose those whispers "It was you who never knew them"
Then I realized that all I see, I realized all I feel
is not reality; for hidden was the truth within.
Within the faces piercing,
for I saw these faces after my glasses broke.
In truth were they true friends,
merry tunes in silence of grief,
but late it is for amends!
The eroding gale, to see, I failed,
with my broken glasses.
Their wait was for one man,
one reminiscing recalled;
an old friend, a companion.
But I misjudged their smiles for scorn,
through my broken glasses.
Her love was so true,
only had I accepted,
alas I was cruel!
Am I even worth to be loved,
with my broken glasses?
The tale ended, when I had passed the road.
No stares pulling on me, as if I were all alone.
But I was broken, broken within my heart.
And so I realized too late;
that I should have taken off my glasses when my glasses broke.
| Deviant Login | Shop | Join deviantART for FREE  |
Take the Tour  |
But then again, they had "The Sound of Silence" so I can't complain
This poem reminded me of Simon and Garfunkel. "The Sound of Silence". If you've seen Watchmen, its played when the comedian's being buried. Its really really good.
Yes I did, but.. after line 2 it felt like it was going to rhyme and then it didn't, that threw me off a bit. I liked it because it turned out to be not quite what the reader first expected and was a nice sort of lesson...
2. Did this sound more like a poem with fine rhyming/meter/form or felt better as a song?
I think it felt better as a song.
3. Most important question What did broken glasses mean to you?
It meant the way the subject saw the world... he was looking at the world through a 'cracked vision' that was nothing to do with any kind of eyewear... he saw evil and betrayal where there was none, and only realised later that this was the case. Sometimes something can happen to 'break our glasses' and we start to see only bad things in the world.. maybe we're having a bad day, maybe our trust was betrayed.. but we need to cast those off so that we don't miss the good things right in front of us or even worse, mistake them for evil...
4. General comments.
I am also glad that you grasped well the concpet of broken glasses. That is just what I meant. Also you don't have to stress so hard to comment on my works