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:iconnotensmsk: More from NotenSMSK


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Submitted on
June 28, 2012
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He stares in a mirror through eyes clogging tears
a smirk persisting alongside; a dead, worthless sneer.
He stares hard yet recognizing not the man he sees
recognizing that man is a desperately elevated dream of his

He wonders if his deeds - reflected - are right
he betrayed his friends, he abandoned his wife
reasons always lurk in the pits of the mind
yet so dark? At times his cynical heart reclined.

He smiled on insults and laughed in disgrace
he knew not what he was so he altered his face
with each turn and bend, with each traffic light
his face twist and turned, losing remnants of sight.

A con you could say, no one pronounced his name
he beamed when spat at; he felt no shame
He would pose a victim, he would express pain
he then shall betray that companion, again and again

Yet if one ponders with reason, the fault is not his;
not knowing purpose of life created what he is
so he adapts like the crops that adapt to the rain
all he does is adapt to what shall bring him gain

A corpse now remains, that is all one would see
zombie inviting chaos as if that was all he could be.
Yet he wishes to revert, if only one time
he could recognize in the mirror, the frightful mime

He stared deeper one last time but alas he could not solve the case
for all he saw in the mirror, was a man without a face.
:bulletyellow:Everyone should have a purpose of life. Unless a man defines it, he cannot decide on other actions of his, descsions of life move in a haphazard dance and eventually a person is just left as a corpse moving around.

:bulletyellow:A person who just takes any sort of gain and adapts to situations only for the sole purpose of finding the reason of his existence.

:bulletyellow:This work reflects such a man. A man who knows not who he is, a man without a face.

For those Kind enough to critique:

1. What sort of feelings do you have for the man?

2. Do you side with him in any way?

3. Over all, did the work make sense?

4. General comments.

Thank you!

P.S No, this is not slenderman or at least was in no way inspired by him.
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:iconcerealnovels:
1. The man made me think of the monster in Mary Shelley's Frankenstein. He had potential for good but it got so twisted because his expectations weren't met. Physically he was a monster and then he became one in his soul. His appearance was no longer the real problem.
2. I did not side with him. but I did have pity for him.
3. Over all it did make sense.
5. It made me think. I appreciate the link you sent so I could read this. It is always cool to discover another's perspective and words.
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:iconnotensmsk:
NotenSMSK 4 days ago  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for answering the question and for the fav :hug:

That is a very interesting perspective! I like that! I honestly had something different in mind but that is the beauty of perspectives :)

Thus I will agree with you that perspectives are always interesting.
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:iconshehrozeameen:
shehrozeameen Feb 24, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I'm sorry for keeping this brief, but we've talked about this quite often. So... *shrug*


1. What sort of feelings do you have for the man?

I honestly don't know... I have yet to meet such a person... More often than not, they exist, yes; but they don't have anything which brings me towards them... I can't say what they're like...

2. Do you side with him in any way?

... Continuing from where I left off in the first, I've been there at times... I tend to wonder about whether the people I do care about, would help me in understanding what I am or who I am. And this isn't the past per say - this is just with reference to recent events that happened... I doubted myself, but I was surprised with the responses I got about me... often times, I felt awkward about what I think about myself.

That isn't to say I take spats easily, or that I'm just willing to change myself completely so that other people see a morbid disfigurement of an existence. For every time I show that annoying retarded side of myself, there have been occasions when I was sober, like I am often here on dA; then there were times when I just blew it... those were rare, but they left a mark; heck, one thing remained constant... the bluntness to be what I want to be when I felt like it...

so in a way... I think this man's doing what he feels is beneficial in his eyes.

3. Over all, did the work make sense?

Its a true story, isn't it *smiles*

And a general comment: 2. is that way because, this is how I think of it: people, for all they know and for all they're capable of, need to be guided. when they have no guidance, there're two choices they make: succumb and adapt, or strengthen and persevere. the man without a face is the former. Some of them, can become famous, but for all cases, they come out shallow after a point... you look down upon them and then you move on...

It is only, after they understand this cold fact... can they invariably change as people... can they be... better than the average fool or charlatan...
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:iconnotensmsk:
NotenSMSK Mar 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
This wasn't brief and sorry for having reached this comment of yours quite late. Am busy :stare:

You should know such people :hmm: I mean they are easy to recognize right?

Every person has such a side (usually). But when you lose sight of yourself, that is what is portrayed. When you have no likes and dislikes, when you don't feel what others don't want you to feel. That does not happen that often but mind me, it does happen.

Well it is sort of a true story and for some unknown reason your smile creeped me out and YES... I know creeped is not a word :B

Thank you for the comment :D
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:iconshehrozeameen:
shehrozeameen Mar 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
That, I understand.

Not exactly... they come out when you least expect it.

That, I'll keep in mind.

Pleh, why, I don't know.
Reply
:iconnotensmsk:
NotenSMSK Mar 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Ah I see. btw... new work is up.
Reply
:iconshehrozeameen:
shehrozeameen Mar 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I saw. I'll upload mine when I can manage :)
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:iconnotensmsk:
NotenSMSK Mar 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Take your time... and your phones are off??
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:iconshehrozeameen:
shehrozeameen Mar 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
We talked =p
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:iconlaeneris:
Laeneris Oct 20, 2012  Student Writer
:omg: I'm kind of speechless. It's written in such a way that it's very easy to read, but may require a second thought to truly understand (if one can ever understand poetry that's not their own work... :giggle:). I love the concept, the execution, everything!

Out of all your brilliant lines, this is by far my favourite:
he knew not what he was so he altered his face
:heart:
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