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:iconnotensmsk:
Okay... other than the fact that the title seems to be missing the 'O' in Ocean... the title was beautiful. I loved it and knowing you were the author behind it, I knew it was supposed to be wonderful.

Having said that lets move to the work. The beauty of this is firstly, that it is so short. I am always amazed how someone manages to say so much in so less words and you managed it beautifully. Secondly, I was unable to determine whether this was prose or poetry. I was breathless over the expressions used and the vivid language as well as the technique of comparing the person to the ocean.

Now on to your questions... the story line was perfectly clear (I hope I didn't misinterpret it :D).

I personally loved the entire work but the sentence "his sea-foam eyes had plighted me and blighted me" seems to stand out due to the usage of the two words blighted and plighted. One other reason might be because in a MAJOR work of mine... the same two words have been used with the exact intention. Oh it is not on DA ^^

There was an impact. The way you started (and the title as well) that the occean amassed every tear and that most important lessons com accompanied by saltwater. So the overall work had an impact on me but not that I was crying but like... I will remember it perhaps when ever salt water and tears are mentioned to me.

Wonderful work!
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2 out of 2 deviants thought this was fair.

Comments


:iconsammur-amat:
Sammur-amat Dec 8, 2012   General Artist
Edited the title! :giggle:
Thank you so very kindly for your humbling critique! :love:
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:iconnotensmsk:
NotenSMSK Dec 8, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
You are very welcome :huggle:
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:iconsammur-amat:
Sammur-amat Dec 8, 2012   General Artist
:love:
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